Table of Contents
How do I communicate with borderline personality disorder?
Here are a few basic pointers for communicating with someone with borderline personality disorder in a healthy and productive way:
- Be patient.
- Be realistic.
- Try to separate facts from feelings.
- Validate feelings first.
- Listen actively and be sympathetic.
- Seek to distract when emotions rise.
Why is borderline personality disorder so hard?
Living with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is difficult for many reasons, including unstable relationships, emotional reactivity and dysregulation, impulsivity, and other challenging features.
Should you use “you” or “I” when talking to someone with BPD?
By avoiding “you” statements, you may reduce the defensiveness or anger someone with BPD might react with, as the problem has been presented as your problem and not theirs. Even clearly using “I” statements may not work immediately as the person with Borderline Personality Disorder may still hear “you” statements.
Why do people with BPD struggle with communication?
It’s important to remember that people with BPD who struggle with communicating directly are not doing so to manipulate others — they are often simply struggling to get their emotional needs met and don’t know how to ask directly.
Can I learn to communicate effectively with people with borderline personality disorder?
Learning to communicate needs directly and effectively is something everyone struggles with at some point in their lives. For folks with borderline personality disorder (many of whom grew up in incredibly invalidating or abusive environments) this can be especially difficult.
What triggers a BPD emotional outburst?
As Randi Kreger and Paul T. Mason explain in their book “Stop Walking on Eggshells,” you may inadvertently trigger a BPD emotional outburst but your behavior didn’t cause it. Many people in close relationships with a person who has Borderline Personality Disorder take on all of the responsibility for solving the other person’s problems.